The Human Concept
by mandaree1
Summary: Pearl is still learning the ins-and-outs of humans. Amethyst is just trying to keep the hype real on the way home.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe!**

 **Title: The Human Concept**

 **Summary: Pearl is still learning the ins-and-outs of humans. Amethyst is just trying to keep the hype real on the way home.**

 **Setting: "Last One Out of Beach City."**

 **...**

Pearl feels fizzy.

Fizzy is a weird word. Giddy probably works better in this context. She drives- safely- but her eyes are glazed over, as though in a trance. Her form feels like it's tingling under the layer humans would call skin. She has a vague understanding of Amethyst's bouncing act earlier; the excitement and anxiety cocktail is making her want to jiggle her leg and sing. Neither of which are suited to driving.

So, yes. Fizzy.

She supposes she's doing better than Amethyst. The gem has scarcely stopped looking at the slip of paper long enough to blink, the goofiest of grins on her face. Pearl hasn't seen Amethyst this unceasingly happy since she was just a pup. (Well, the closest a gem gets to it, anyway.)

"If I didn't know better, I'd think she'd given that to you instead of me."

Amethyst flushes self-consciously but giggles while she does it, flashing her a toothy grin that honestly borderlines on aggressive. _No, no, don't think like that. Amethyst isn't like that._ "Sorry, P. I'm just real happy for ya."

Pearl feels light begin collect in her cheeks, tinging them blue. "Yes, well."

"'Bout time you started looking." She finished simply. "Or, at the very least, realized just how cute some'a the ladies are in these parts. You don't _have_ to look- Garnet doesn't- but come'on."

She's noticed that just fine, thank you very much. It's hard _not_ to see the generous beauty of Garnet's thighs, the protection one feels when just being under her gaze, the softness of Amethyst's form and her untamed hair. She notices these things, but had never necessarily found herself attracted to them; physically, perhaps, but never emotionally. Garnet had no interest whatsoever, and Amethyst is off carving her own story in terms of romance.

It occurs to Pearl that, like her, Amethyst probably has a type. She has absolutely no idea what that type would be. Or maybe she's just in it for the physicality of it. Whatever the case, she seems far more into humans than she is gems, so perhaps that constitutes as a type.

"Amethyst?"

"Hmm?" She cracked open her eyes, arms crossed behind her head. The number lay safe in her lap.

"Is this what you see in humans?" Pearl bit her lip, trying to decipher the right words. "Fun? Excitement? Nothing too dangerous, of course, but a sense of the feeling?"

"More or less, yeah. Depends on the human." Amethyst shrugged, turning a surprisingly piercing look her way. A frown tugged on the edges of her plump lips. "In a good way, or a bad way?"

"How do you mean?"

"Is this a Ruby-and-Sapphire sort of deal, or a Renegade-Pearl-tryin'-to-get-her-butt-crushed-in-the-war thing?"

 _Like you would know_ , she thinks, but isn't nearly cruel enough to say. Pearl recognized just how much not being able to fight in the war teetered Amethyst off-balance in her sense of usefulness. She also knows that, for all her jokes, she fears a true clash with Homeworld; they all heard her desperate cries detailing their abrupt end when Peridot first appeared. This was supposed to be a fun night for her.

"It's neither." She replied. "I doubt I'd ever have the sort of relationship Ruby and Sapphire have, and there's no reason to pledge myself to her in that way, either."

"Even when you like 'em, they're still just humans." There's a tart note of disapproval to her tone, but Amethyst doesn't tell Pearl exactly what's going on in her mind, and it's impossible to tell during conversations like this.

"Would you rather I did the former?" She asks, mildly hurt.

"Nope. 'Course not." Amethyst sinks lower in her seat, stretching stubby legs. "I wouldn't wish that on anybody."

How easily she can say that! Like she hasn't spent an entire day injured before, calmly making jokes and waiting for her demise. Pearl helped train her, and to this day she _still_ can't quite comprehend Amethyst fully. She always feels two degrees off from the full truth.

A skin-pink hand reached out from the backseat to tap the purple woman's shoulder. An achingly familiar soft face peeked out between them.

"Are we having another one of those heart-destroying conversations?" Steven asks. "'Cause I think it's too late to have one of those. I mean, I have to go to bed soon."

"Nah, dude, nothing like that." Amethyst ruffles his hair, and there's almost a motherly glow in her eyes. "Pearl over here s'just rethinking her entire life."

"Amethyst." Pearl warns.

"Ooh!" His eyes widen with understanding. "Like a mid-life crisis?"

"A what?" Pearl asks.

"Yes." Amethyst says.

"I'm not sure what that is, but a woman probably isn't enough to incite it." She stated, shifting uncomfortably. The immediate answer told her that Amethyst had already come to that conclusion.

"Who said it had anything to do with the girl?" Amethyst shrugged, closing her eyes as though for a nap. "It's the age and the stage. And the concept. Humans discovered it, so you should probably learn it. Y'know, knock her socks off."

 **Author's Note: Basically I love Mystery Girl so I thought I'd make a random drabble that has nothing to do with her. Sigh.**

 **I'd write her, if I knew anything about her personality. Which I'm keeping my fingers crossed we _do_ learn.**

 **-Mandaree1**


End file.
